Negative Effects of Porn

Mormons have an unhealthy obsession with porn. More so than the people with so-called porn addictions they are so worried about.
I believe its impossible to go an entire month without hearing a porn-centric speech at church. Don't even get me started on General Conference! Not only do the men get scolded on their porn habits, but the women are told not to become "walking pornography" by dressing immodestly. (Though I guess I would rather be walking porn than chewed up gum)

I have yet to figure out what the actual problem with porn is, other than people feeling bad because they're told they should feel bad. I've heard a few different arguments, like the fact that you don't want to be walking down the aisle on your wedding day and suddenly have thoughts of some woman getting stuffed by two well-endowed men. And maybe they have a point. I saw Jason Segal naked in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and now I can't get through an episode of How I Met Your Mother without humping my TV.

-ECoG

Who are you?

"Every member a missionary!" That's what you're told from day one, but that will never be more clear than when you leave the church. Even if you still believe but have fallen into inactivity, or worse, the dreaded doubt you will become every members' favorite project.
People who live three houses away will mourn the loss of your presence in their lives while failing to realize that they can still contact you at any time. They don't even need to bribe you with fresh, hot cookies (though that doesn't hurt)
I've heard from some fellow exmos that they have been approached by complete strangers and fed the "I miss seeing you!" line, which would promptly turn awkward when it was pointed out that they did not in fact know each other.

-ECoG

So why did you REALLY leave the church?

Being a Mormon means feeling like you're part of something special. From the day you're old enough to learn, you are taught that you have the secrets to the one true path to happiness. Because of this, members have a hard time understanding why others would want to leave.
We can list all the reasons we want, from Joseph Smith's marriage to 14 year old girls, or sexual interrogations of minors but it will almost always fall on deaf ears.
It is so much easier to paint us all as bitter, angry apostates who got offended by one of the "non perfect" members of the church. Or degenerates who just want to drink and have butt loads of premarital sex (hehe)

Its a slow, uphill battle, but I think with the church releasing the new "tough issues" essays, people may find it easier to understand where we're coming from.... Hopefully

Helen Marr Kimball "almost 15"

The church released another one of its "tough issues" essays all about polygamy!
In it, they briefly touch on the subject of Joseph marrying women who were already married. And Helen Marr Kimball, who according to the flowery language of the Holy PR Department, was "a few months before her 15th birthday" what? Here in reality, we call that 14 years old.
I won't go in depth on the polygamy issues, that's a subject for another blog, another day. I just wanted to vent my frustration at the people who think there's any justification for a grown man coercing a child into a marriage she didn't want and raping her. Its just sick and pisses me the fuck off. If you are one of these people who think there's any way to excuse this behavior, I just want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, you disgust me.

-ECOG

Why are you so obsessed?

My last two posts got a little "rambly" so I'll keep this one short.
This is another all-too-frustrating conversation that happens all-too-often in my life. Members have a hard time recognizing that their constant flooding of social media, general conference quotes, visits from missionaries, and all around badgering are a bit....obnoxious.
They expect their friends and families to accept their proclamations with open arms ears, but when they are instead met with push back or difficult truths about the church, they accuse their friends of being "anti" or "obsessed with the church."

One common quip among members is "they can leave the church, but they can't leave the church alone." Of course we can't leave the church alone, you won't let us!

-ECOG
Emancipated Child of God

Blind Obedience

I have had this exact infuriating conversation too many times to count.

The only thing Mormons love more than preaching obedience and how people shouldn't rely solely on logic in making major life decisions is talking about how much the church emphasizes personal study and formal education.

The church is seeing some major complications right now. With the popularity of the internet, members are starting to get a real inside look at the history that we were never taught in Sunday school. Marriage equality and the ordination of women are two issues at the forefront at the moment.

A few months ago, prominent Mormon feminist Kate Kelly was excommunicated for organizing a group of women and asking permission to enter the priesthood session at conference. All women in the church are asking for is to be on equal footing with the men in charge. They want the ability to bless their ill children and be involved with baptisms and decision making. This is something the leaders (through the holy PR department) have made clear will never happen. Much like how they said black members of the church would never receive the priesthood.... An eternal truth they later redacted in 1978.

From the time the ban was instated, until the day it was lifted many people would ask why such a policy would be in place to begin with. Why would God and the church deny black members one of the most important steps to salvation? The response would be that God work in mysterious ways and its not our place to question his methods.
It is usually at this point that people will state that they are uncomfortable with blind obedience and that any policy with a "because I said so" answer is not something they are willing to support.
Members will explain the importance of personal prayer and scripture study, that everyone is capable of receiving personal revelation. 

This year the LDS website released an essay addressing the complicated issue of race and admitted that the policy was merely a result of Brigham Young's racist feelings and that God never sanctioned such a ban. It is important to note that several men who petitioned for black men to be ordained in priesthood were excommunicated, much like our good friend Kate Kelly.

Now this seems like a complicated issue to bring up doesn't it?  All those years of the priesthood ban would've had members praying to god and receiving personal revelation that it was wrong, a revelation they would get excommunicated for. Today we have many women in the church praying to god and receiving personal revelation that the ban on women being ordained is wrong and are getting excommunicated for it. They are being criticized for challenging the prophets even though we have been shown that the prophets have been gravely wrong in the past. So what is the response people are giving these women when they talk about their personal revelations? That obedience is a virtue and the prophets "will not and cannot lead us astray!"

This circular reasoning giving you a headache? Me too

Meet Thee Mormons #1

Hello! Thank you for joining me for the inaugural edition of Meet Thee Mormons.
This comic will be showcasing some of the problematic cultural issues that don't get talked about in the Mormon church. This is not meant to be an attack on the church or individual people, but is an attempt to use humor to get people thinking about how their actions and words effect those around them.

Issue #1 is based on a true story. When I was 20-ish, my brother got married to a wonderful woman he met at church. I flew from Utah to Washington DC to be with my family in this great time. At the time I was married (to a not-so-wonderful man) and was sporadically active in church. I was having doubts in the gospel but thought that I still believed in the core doctrine and in god. My biggest issue was being able to afford tithing (for those unfamiliar, you are required to "donate" 10% of your income to be considered a member "in good standing" in the Mormon church.) I was barely making enough money to cover my bills and paying 10% of my income to the church would've left me either homeless or hungry. Because I couldn't afford to pay, I was not a member in good standing and could not get what is called a "temple recommend." This recommend is what you need to be granted access to the temple where Mormon weddings (called sealings) take place.
Mormon couples do have the option of having a civil ceremony but they are discouraged from doing so as they will have to wait a full year before being allowed to go to the temple to be "sealed for time and all eternity."

As my brother and his new bride were inside the temple getting married surrounded by my family and hers, I was sitting alone in the temple parking lot waiting for the ceremony to end so I could join for the family pictures. This was one of the worst moments of my life.

I broke down crying more than a few times, which my family chalked up to me realizing that I miss the blessing that the church provides and wanting to do better to receive those. In reality my shelf was beginning to crack in regards to the church. I was starting to realize that all those times I had heard "its all about family!" and "Family: Isn't it about.......time?" I was really being fed empty cliches. Many underage or "unworthy" Mormons (or family members who aren't members) are excluded when it comes to the weddings of their loved ones. They often have to stay home, or end up babysitting the children of those who are allowed to be a part of the special experience.

One of the attributes members like to brag about the church is the family values it encourages, and how family always comes first, but what they fail to mention is that only really counts if the entire family is towing the line and paying their dues.

Thank you for checking out my comic! Be sure to check back next week to find out all about obedience and personal revelation.

Much love,
ECOG
(The Emancipated Child of God)